I'm smiling on the inside
I found out that an old friend of mine committed suicide. Can't let it affect me too much though, one more depression mood and Ben will kill me. Anyway, I better go. D and Benny are secretly talking about me.
I'd like to run away
From you,
But if you didn't come
And find me ...
I would die.
~ by Shirley Bassey ~
If I know what love is,
It is because of you.
~ by Herman Hesse ~
I'm so star struck in love with you know who, it's driving me insane, damn damn damn I hate it but love it at the same time. *hits her head*
Hit me somebody, pleeease.
"Seductively innocent in your eyes...."
Or not...I'm obsessed with Kylie's 'Slow'
"Slow down and dance with me, yeah, slow. Skip a beat and move with my body...yeah, slow"
Anyway, nothing much happened today, except I've cut me hand open which sucks ass, who would put metal strips on lockers?
Oh wait, move over kylie, here comes natalie imbruglia:
"I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm, he came around like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldn't be that man I adored
You don't seem to know, don't seem to care what your heart is for
But I don't know him anymore
There's nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry
That's whats going on, nothing's fine I'm torn
I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
You're a little late, I'm already torn"
Damn her lyrics are good. Yeh I really wish Ben would talk to me more at school and damn I should stop my whining, *hits desk*
I had the worse dream last night, I dreamt that Ben died after an arguement between us, I woke up afterwards, crying, I cried so hard I had to throw up because I felt so sick with myself. It was so bad...damn damn I love him, my year 8 girls basketball team lost their game to sacred heart, which sucks because I hate that school so much. waa waa waa, I'm tired..lalala, "and dream of me, I wish you would dream of me.." bored bored bored. Post later, anyone reading this write me a message on my chatboard which is on the right of this page somewhere.
I had to get this off my chest
'I love Ben' fuck, I'm not over him at all, I havent deleted all the sweet emails he sent me during the holidays, I can quote them all, I can't stop ringing him up, I only think about him. Gah, love sucks.
Taani's Party was on Saturday night. It was alright, but could've been better. Ben came ^_^ yay and what I remember of him is promising to be best friends forever, aww he's so cute.
I got hell ripped up in the backyard and I swear that half the people at the party were! Well I'm sitting in creative writing right now with Damo on my side, he's a darlin :) Anyway I better go.
Ciao! xox
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